Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Panic at the Trailer Park!

I woke up this morning in a complete state of panic.  It wasn't because there were tornadoes. (I really don't have to worry about that because I live in the southwest.) It also wasn't because God hates trailers so much, He decided to make fire tornadoes to drive the point home. The panic was due to the fact that I realized because of the whole appletini-detox incident, I had missed my prince deadline. I am not sure what happens next. I mean, if I don't make my deadline does this mean I don't get a prince EVER!?!?!?
Then I realized that I still hadn't had a cup of coffee or my cigarette yet and that took precedence. As I was sitting outside, it occurred to me that I could probably ask for an extension, given that there had never before been a Diznee Trailer Park Princess.
I don't follow rules. I break them and then make them. If that doesn't work, then I just fake them. I think I want to drag out being a Diznee Trailer Park Princess as long as possible. I mean if I find my prince and have my happily ever after, I am out of the picture right? I become a Trailer Park Queen and that just doesn't have the same ring to it. Besides there is a guy who lives a couple of trailers down who already has that moniker and I REALLY don't want to get confused with Miss Nova Gina. Does a drag show every other Friday night.
Besides, I just reconnected with my birth Fairy Godmother and I want to extort, I mean really get to know her as much as possible. I guess  I need to do some research and find out what are my options. Is there a hand book or guidelines...sheesh. I suppose worst case scenario, there is always that magical place...the INTERNET. Click your heels, cross your fingers and wish me luck... I am gonna need it.

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